heroes for sale

my heroes are for sale. it was all over the superbowl last night. they are all their own people and they don't owe me anything. but sitting there, watching 'em peddle stuff on tv, it was a clear reminder that i should never allow myself to invest too heavily in heroes. if i want to set up my own standards in life, i can only hold myself accountable and can't measure others on how i think life should be lived. everyone's gotta figure their own rules out. 

i'm not mad at you bob dylan. you're in the business of selling cars on tv now and wasn't that one of your songs in that yogurt ad as well? you doubled down on yourself on superbowl sunday and i'm sure the pay out was significant. you even stared at a younger you on the cover of a magazine in said car commercial. it's like you knew (as you always have) that the critics would be there to criticize your decision so you gave 'em all the grand 'fuck you.' you know who you are and who you were and it was all our fault for thinking you were something you're not.

i'm not mad at you hulk hogan. when did you ever have integrity? you told me as a kid to say my prayers and eat my vitamins and that was good enough i suppose. you were a cathartic hero for a kid who just wanted to see someone slay the giant. you did all that a long time ago. you fulfilled the prophesy. so wear that yellow and red and let the world take notice as the pythons run wild all over us as they hold up products that can be purchased at your local radioshack... brother.

i'm not mad at the red hot chili peppers. maybe their performance was prerecorded. maybe the instruments weren't plugged in. maybe they only played a part of a song that was a huge radio hit damn near twenty years ago. play the hits, or in this instance, the hit. i don't know if this was a torch passing of some sort or just an easy chance to scream out, 'hey, we're still here and we're still a cooler alternative to listening to u2.' seriously... i fucking love the red hot chili peppers. and maybe what they did was good for bruno mars, who i personally think fucking killed it last night. i'm just sorta confused about the peppers role in all of this and would've much preferred a 4-5 song set of theirs where they cram one new one in there to the dismay of everyone but me, cuz i think the new album is pretty cool.

joe namath, put the fur coat away. can't you just admit that you got old? phil simms seems to be okay with it. way to botch the coin toss. also, get out of this blog post, you're not a hero. you're just the only quarterback to lead my favorite football team to a superbowl. 

hey muppets. i know, you're muppets. you always light up the screen and make things at least twice as enjoyable as they were than before you showed up. but i can't see the spirit of jim henson in all of this. i recently read that jim henson's goal when he created, 'fraggle rock,' was to end all wars. he may have been a little heavy on the idealism, but the world needs a bit of that.... it needs it now just as much as it needed it back then. i'd rather see electric mayhem put a single out with tom morello than attempt to use their groovy tunes to sell cars. don't be such a bob dylan.

much love and respect to the beastie boys. goldieblox had their big superbowl commercial. there was recently much controversy over goldieblox using a parody of the beastie boys track, 'girls,' and the beastie boys seeking legal action against them because of it. the beastie boys don't play that shit. don't matter what it is, even if the product seems wholesome enough. their integrity is not for sale. it's in mca's will. he lived and died on that principle. if you're looking for sellouts, i hear quiet riot comes cheap.