don't wanna be another internet cry baby

i haven't written anything on this blog lately.

i used to hate that phrase. back in the myspace days, i used to type that all the time, somewhere in the beginning of my blogs. and i'd always read them back and think, 'why did i write that? it sounds stupid.' my blog seemed to carry a theme of a dude who doesn't blog a lot. and i didn't want it to be about that. i either wanted to blog more or if not, respect the topic at hand and not give it a half assed intro that includes, "oh by the way, i don't do this a lot." if you heard a musician or a comedian or some athlete say this before a big show, game, or event, that wouldn't instill much confidence that what's to follow is worth sticking around for.

so why go back on this and use that phrase now? cuz in this instance, it's sorta what this particular rambling is gonna be about. this will only by my third post for the month of march. that's pretty weak compared to my usual writing frequency. but it's cuz i find myself troubled as a writer. i suddenly find myself in a position where i don't wanna be another nagging voice on the internet complaining about stuff. i figure the internet is already filled to the brim with that. and when i come across it, most of the time i don't dig it. so why turn around and spit that sorta stuff out myself?

and i know why. it's a two-fold answer really. first reason is that it's easy. so easy. turn on a tv. go to any news website. open your eyes. walk the streets. the world is filled with an infinite amount of subject matter to complain about. just throw a dart at the board and complain about whatever you hit. fucking drones. fucking michael vick's book. y'know, that sorta stuff.

the second reason is that i'm a human being prone to emotion. i get mad. i get angry. if i find myself in front of a keyboard under that kinda emotional influence, i'm prone to let it bleed into the writing. so when i'm pissed i'll think something like, "oh, y'know what would help me feel better? if i blogged about the inconsistency of the 192 bus to lyndhurst." so lately when i've been feeling rage-ish, i stay away from the computer. just don't wanna throw that out there in the world. you probably don't wanna hear about it and i should really be writing an email to new jersey transit if that's the case.

i guess the convoluted point i'm trying to make is that complaining about stuff at random is never gonna fix anything. i mean, on a big enough scale it might. but i'm not gonna complain about anything anyone else more famous than me isn't already complaining about. the internet probably has all angles covered on all topics. i doubt i have anything new to bring to the table. and anytime i do think that, i'm almost certain i'm a google search away from finding out how wrong that notion is.

i can tell you what's wrong with people and things and stuff and what-have-you.... but who can't? tell me how to fix people, things, and stuff. give me solutions and not just empty complaining. no one likes a cry baby and everyone thinks a baby who can change his/her own diaper is awesome (or the thought of one since one probably doesn't exist).

okay, rambling done. i'm sure i'll void this whole concept sometime soon when i inevitably encounter something that pisses me off.