josh wells, envy of the laundromat

i did my laundry today. and as always, laundry entails a trip to the local laundromat.

it's always an experience, usually teeters towards not so much fun... but i try and make the best of it... cuz one way or the other, i have to get my clothes clean or else people will stop talking to me.

i'm a bachelor. i live by myself. i do laundry for me and only me. and though it's a chore and like most chores i don't enjoy it much, when i compare my situation to those around me, i don't feel so bad about the whole thing. i show up with one bag and can usually fit it all inside one big washer and one big dryer.

meanwhile i'm surrounded by parents and children who show up with several bags stuffed with all their clothing, bedding, and whatnot. they cannot simply settle for one machine. they usually need many. this is not going to be an easy process for them. they'll have to eye machines that are almost finished with the previous person's laundry and, more often than not, settle for machines that are far apart from each other.

me? i don't even divide my whites and my colors.

i walked in thinking this was a chore. but when i looked around, i saw a battle. this is no time for fun and games. for the parents that show up, this is a war zone, not suited for the meek and weak willed. the more children you have, the more severe the whole laundromat situation becomes.

and here i am looking for one quick machine. i'm in and out of there. it never takes me more than two hours... which is a time span that would feel like recess for most of them. once my machine's rolling, i'm free to do whatever. i have no kids to look after. sometimes i walk home and come back later. sometimes i go out to eat. sometimes i go grab a sandwich and bring it back to the laundromat and proceed to feed my fat face in front of everybody else. yes kids, i eat cookies after my sandwich. i'm an adult. i can do that shit.

sometimes i read books or listen to music. as soon as my clothes are in the confines of a machine, i don't have another care in the world. sometimes i'll play video games.

right now they have a hydro-boat-machine racing game that i played. i sat in the chair for player one and some random kid decided to sit next to me in player two's chair. he didn't play the game himself. he was satisfied to sit and watch and root for me. i came in sixth place out of fifteenth.... the kid sitting next to me made me feel like i won the game just by knowing how to control my hydro-boat-machine.

as soon as the game was done, i walked back over to the other side of the laundromat to see how much more time i had left. the kid sitting next to me got up and followed me. i turned around and he asked me to play again. i told him, 'sorry kid. i'm not playing again.' as i said this, i could feel the despair of some parent who realized their short lived break from their kid was about to come to a crashing end. the kid turned around and ran straight over to his parents.

i'm not knocking anyone for having children. i'm sure it's all the rainbows and joy they tell you it is on television. but i can't help to feel fortunate knowing that when i go to the laundromat, i'm in and i'm out. it's just me, one bag, one machine. i don't even fold there... i bring it home to fold. once parents are finished with laundry, they'll go home and they'll still have to feed their children or help them with homework or put them to bed. as soon as i exit the laundromat, my list of responsible things to do for the day comes to an end and i go home and watch playoff basketball. it's a pretty sweet deal when i put it into perspective.