ray manzarek

ray manzarek passed away may 20th of this year. he was the keyboardist of the doors.

when i was a teenager, i loved the doors... fucking loved the doors. i mean, i still love the doors, but it's not the same. back then, it meant so much more to me. the doors were probably the first band i listened to that made me feel cool. looking back, i was no where near as cool as i thought i was in my own head, but hey, back then it did the trick and got me through some tough times.

when other kids in school started wearing all black cuz they just discovered gothic music, i was starting to rock all black clothing cuz i thought it made me closer to the lizard king. true fucking story. jim morrison was the epitome of what cool was to me at that point in time. first and foremost, chicks dug him. he was the lead singer of one of the most popular rock bands of all time. but he was different from other lead singers. he wasn't fucking vince niel from motley crue. morrison dug poetry and was well read. he was into art. it was like a tip of the hat to all the dorks of the world who thought that being artsy and/or smart automatically eliminated you from being cool.

and the doors didn't sound like anything else. that was kinda the end all, be all to any of those dumb arguments you got into with your friends as a kid about who's favorite band was better... "oh yeah, well nothing sounds like the doors. their sound was more original than your favorite band's sound." (looking back, 99 out of 100 times i was probably correct.) and the main reason for that original sound was ray manzarek... the dude behind the keys.

the heaviest parts of my doors phase spanned a good amount of formative years. it took me at least from high school to when i dropped out of community college. although i can't specifically remember, i'm sure the first thing i did after i decided i wasn't gonna go to college anymore was drink cheap beer and listen to the album, 'la woman.' not that i'm trying to glorify dropping out of school, don't do it kids. but i did it and i didn't care cuz my existence at that moment in time revolved around trying to have as much fucked up fun as possible... which was kinda a theme with the doors.

at age 33, i don't listen to the doors as much as i used to. i give 'em a spin every so often and most times it brings me back to an earlier time in my life (which is kinda weird i guess since the music was recorded at an earlier time in my parents' life before i existed). but when ray manzarek passed away, i thought about how much the music meant to me. no matter how often i listen to it, it'll always be there, ingrained in my head. i'll never forget the lyrics. i'll never not know how to play air guitar or air keys (air keys being a rare treat that i usually only bust out for the likes of the doors, billy joel, and pink floyd) to their music.

and i also thought about how they went on tour about ten years ago with the lead singer of the cult, ian astbury, playing the role of jim morrison. i was such a stupid fucking elitist about the whole thing at the time so i screamed, "BLASPHEMY! NO JIM, NO DOORS!" and now that ray's gone, i look back and wish i didn't have that stick up my ass. it would've been such a blast to be surrounded by thousands of other doors fans singing and rocking out in unison. for just that moment, the music would've been alive again. what a missed opportunity.

anyways... gonna go blast the album, 'la woman,' now and try to remember that no matter what happens, once the music's been written, it'll always be alive and the memory of ray and jim will always exist through their songs.