i should be in arcade fire

why are there so many people in the band arcade fire? are all of them necessary? is there room for one more? can i ask to join? would they mind? i don't have any musical talent but it looks like fun to be in a band that has so many people that i actually have to count out loud or use my fingers before coming to the conclusion.

i perform stand up comedy. it gets so lonely up on that stage. sometimes i become envious of bands and the way they get to share a stage together. whether they succeed or fail, they do it together. it makes the possibility of failure seem more fun than it actually is. and if you succeed, you suddenly have other people to share it with. i imagine succeeding at stand up comedy can probably be a lonesome experience in many ways. sure, you might have friends and/or family to share it with, but they're not up there with you. they're not in the trenches dodging bullets. that's you, alone in a foxhole. being lonely sucks. being in a foxhole sucks. now put the two together.

arcade fire is an army. they're like the wu-tang clan of hipster music. arcade fire's not a band. they're a club or a gang. being a member of arcade fire comes with a sense of belonging. so what do you say? got room for one more on that stage? i'll try to take up the least amount of room as possible. i'm sure i can ironically bang on a can or blow into an electric kazoo. i know i'm taller than the lead singer and that might be off-putting, but i can crouch or stand in the back or take a chair. let me know. i'm ready to go.