so long, brian scalabrine

today the news hit the internet like an asteroid hitting the planet. to the dismay of millions of basketball fans worldwide, the great brian scalabrine has decided to hang it up and retire. he stated that no teams have any interest in him, but i can't honestly believe that to be true.



this bench warming every man has been a darling with basketball fans everywhere ever since the new jersey nets drafted him in 2001. he bounced around a few teams in his career but no matter where he landed, one thing always remained the same, his team was always awesome. this can't just be some dumb coincidence. despite his lack of playing time, scalabrine mattered. he knew it, the coaches knew it, and the fans knew it.

he may never have the honor of being inducted into a hall of fame. but who needs a hall of fame when you've already entered the hallowed halls of our hearts? sometimes sports is about a lot more than the dudes with the stacked stat lines. everyone loves an underdog. when scalabrine would actually see playing time, we all saw playing time. he was our nba rudy. he was us.

thank you brian scalabrine. i tip my hat to you. you sir are a goddamned icon and absolutely the only thing i've ever liked about the boston celtics in all of its entire history.