'on the road,' revisited

i recently saw the film adaptation for, 'on the road.' it was out in limited release sometime last year but i never got around to seeing it. 'on the road,' is one of my all time favorite books. and after seeing the movie, i think i know why i consider it one of my favorites now more than i ever did before. the thing is, the book, 'on the road,' fell into my hands at the right time of my life. i needed a book like that to make me think running away from everything was possible. even if i never pulled the trigger myself, when i was a younger dude, i had always had visions of getting in a car or going on a bus and disappearing for a while... having my own on the road adventures. there was this part of me that just needed to believe that if it ever came to it, hitting the road was always a valid option.

but after watching the movie, i realize i'm not that same dude anymore. i've grown up. the idea of running away and trying to experience life at its fullest no matter the cost isn't as endearing to me as it once was. sal and dean run from everything. and they get their kicks. oh do they get their kicks. there's booze, drugs, women, music, and all sorts of fun shenanigans. who doesn't like shenanigans? but something happens along the way. i start to see just what they sacrifice to live such a life. there's love lost and abandoned children. all sorts of hurt feelings are scattered across the country in their wake. in the moment, everything is awesome. but when it gets quiet, and when sal and dean finally  get a moment to themselves to reflect, i can't see how a flood of bullshit that they created won't come back to haunt them.

'on the road,' is about some kind of reckless life. and reckless can be fun. but it can also have its disadvantages. it's an immature kinda selfish. rest of the world be damned if they don't like the life you're livin'. but that's not cool to me anymore. i think that you have to make some concessions in life to make your way in the world. one of the biggest is to simply not be a douchebag to others. sal and dean exhibit all sorts of douchiness throughout, 'on the road.' yea they're some crazy, hip, fun-lovin' guys but any douchebag can have fun. it's about having fun without having to come to the realization that you were a total dick to other people around you, in many cases people you care about, along the way.

i'm still a fan of the mad ones. i still root for the weirdos. i'd still rather hang out with the freaks than the jocks. i think i'll always have an affinity for counterculture in some form or another. but i realized after watching the movie adaptation of, 'on the road,' that i've chosen to do it my way. and my way has a lot less dickishness, a lot less drugs, more stability, and a lot more good nights of sleep.