an unexpected day off

when i went to sleep last night, i had it in my head that i would wake up and run. i had been drinking a fair amount at a friend's barbecue before i went to sleep and i didn't know the severity of my condition until the next morning.

i woke up with thoughts of running. i also woke up with the worst hangover i've had in years. my head was pounding and there was no advil left in my apartment. the closest available relief would be at the cvs three blocks away. i wouldn't get to that for some time. i was also sweating. i stood up and became dizzy. everything hurt. everything sucked. i had to feed my cats and what was usually an easy chore became an unbearable burden.

while feeding my cats, it hit me. there was no way i was gonna run today. i didn't even feel the energy to leave my house to walk three blocks to get to the cvs to purchase the advil i knew i needed if i had any hope of this day getting any better. it was at that moment that i made a deal with myself. i don't take many days off from running. i've been on a roll lately and running hard. i convinced myself it wouldn't be a big deal in my running regimen if i took today off. so i did.

and then i took a shower... which was sorta awesome. that only lasted a few minutes though. as soon as i was showered and dressed, i made my way to cvs. and as soon as i stepped out my door, all i felt was the immense heat of a summer day. i felt groggy and repulsive. i felt like i had no business mixing with the rest of the world. i also felt grateful that i had decided not to run in this relentless heat.

i got the advil and on the way back home stopped at dunkin donuts to get a bagel, some hash browns, and a large coffee. when i got home, the coffee was the only thing i could stomach. i ate one hash brown and my stomach immediately sent signals to my brain that any further attempts at eating would end badly. i took a few more sips of my coffee and then put a blanket over my head and hoped that the three advil i had just taken would act quickly.

advil liquigels have a strange effect on me. i'm not sure if it happens to everybody. but they make me drowsy and almost always inspire naps. it didn't take much for me to fall into nap mode. i was at ease. the idea of running, or any other sort of responsibility, wasn't staring me down. i still felt like shit, but at least i knew that if all else failed, i could toss the whole day away and it wouldn't make much of a difference... and who knows, maybe it'd even act as a recharging of sorts.

so i napped for a couple of hours. as soon as i woke up, i was starving. the bagel and hash browns that i almost couldn't stand to look at a couple hours earlier were devoured in a few minutes. i was starting to feel refreshed. the headache was gone. my friend kevin texted me about going to see some bands. i suddenly felt okay about today.

i just got home from that show. we saw a bunch of bands and it was a benefit show... i didn't know about the benefit part till i got there. and something about that just made me feel good. it put a real positive vibe on everything. live music for a good cause, hanging with friends, ate some grub, drank some beers. everything turned out okay.

i really thought today was gonna suck. when i first accepted the idea that i wasn't gonna run today, i figured today would be a waste. i'd lay around my house battling a hangover, ignoring the world outside, numbing my mind with hours of pointless television. but that didn't happen. i'd usually beat myself up about a day i choose not to run. but today was different.

i am to blame for my hangover. i could've taken it easier last night. but in an odd way, it all worked out for me. i needed a day to say, "fuck it, no running. i'm just gonna try to relax and have fun." and once my hangover was gone, that's exactly what i did. minus the hangover that began my day, today has been completely awesome from top to bottom. i feel refreshed and ready. tomorrow, i run.